Wow, this month has been a hectic one. Beginning with my birthday, then followed by two weeks in the Lake District for Physics By The Lake (which was an absolutely awesome two weeks!), coupled with moving house, July was already hectic for me.

To top it all off, I was at a wedding last week, the wedding of Ben Best and Naomi Bowdler. One I had to travel down to King’s Lynn for.

One where I was the best man.

It’s no wonder that this week I’m absolutely exhausted. I’ve taken this week off from my PhD in order to move into my new place, tidy it up, and rest. However, I wanted to take some time to talk about being the best man at this wedding, and what I took away from it. So, here goes…

I was first asked to be Ben’s Best Man by phone when I was in the Student Union bar with some other members of the department after prospective lecturers were shown round the department. Naturally, I accepted, I was honoured to have been asked.

Naturally, I didn’t realise how much work was involved.

I got to King’s Lynn and Ben’s house on the Monday evening, and visited Naomi’ and her parents with Ben. I had a good evening, the Bowdlers cooked dinner for me, which was gratefully received. We generally had a catch up, having not really seen each other much in the past couple of months.

Tuesday came, and the work began. I didn’t realise how much was still left to do! I still had a speech to finish/start, we had to visit Ben’s parents to ensure that the Order of Service booklet was correct (Ben’s computer was still at his parents at this moment), we had to visit the city centre and ensure everyone had the correct attire, check with other key people that they knew what they were doing. I thought Tuesday was a stressful day, but I thought that the thick of it was over, I had helped Ben sort out what he needed, so that Wednesday was just gonna be a fairly quiet day.

Of course, it never happens like that, Wednesday was worse! Of course, Ben and Naomi were jittery, in fact I wouldn’t mind betting that I was at least as nervous as them! Ben and I took three hours to print Order of Service booklets, ensure he had the correct documents for his honeymoon, finish his speech, finish my speech. In that time, I also had to deal with a couple of other issues that had cropped up, and Ben and Naomi also had to sort stuff out for their honeymoon. By the time we had sorted all that out, we had to rush across to the Church to have a rehearsal – which felt unusually quick! Finally, we had a rather awful meal at some pub nearby, before heading to the Sailing Club, where the reception was to be held. Naturally, because I was taking a friend back to where she was staying, I arrived later, after taking several wrong turnings and almost ending up on a beach!

Leaving the Sailing Club was a chore in it’s own right! Originally, Ben and I both drove separately so that he could leave his car there for the night, before driving to Holland for their honeymoon after the wedding. But, Ben and Naomi hadn’t managed to sort their speech out, so Ben decided that he would take his car back with him too, as I didn’t want to drive her back after they’d finished. Of course, it aspired that I drove her back anyway because he was very tired – but everything worked out and I got enough sleep that night!

Then Thursday was the big day! Stress Central a.k.a. The Wedding! The morning was a frustrating morning, we needed to get to the sailing club, set up a gazebo (a word I didn’t even know existed until that day!) and get back to get ready all in the space of two hours! And I’m pleased to say we managed it! Of course, everything else didn’t seem to run to time!

1.10pm. The Church. After unkindly playing “Consign to Oblivion” to Ben in the car, we arrived. Almost immediately, I was wanted, one of the members of the Band was able to get her exam results that day at 1pm, and therefore wanted my iPhone to check her results (I’m pleased to say she passed!)

That was the simplest request I think I had that day. 1 hour before the wedding, and my nerves were setting in. Had I forgotten anything? Rings in the top pocket, corsage on, speech… left at home. Typical, something had to go wrong. Luckily, that was my own doing, and wasn’t going to affect the marriage.

And so the wedding began, 5 minutes late, which isn’t bad really, I find most occasions run late. Everything was going well, until the giving of the rings! It took me a while to get the rings out of the pocket, which was a highly embarrassing situation for me! I was thankful that the band then proceeded to play the wrong hymn! I wasn’t the only one to mess up! Other than that, the wedding was highly successful! I couldn’t stop smiling!

Then, we arrived at the Sailing Club, and the newlyweds arrived… quite a bit later! As there was no toastmaster, I ended up filling those shoes as well as my duties as Best Man. I was also asked about seating, more people turned up then we anticipated, which was good – though it meant we had to move tables about and things. It also meant that I had more people to give a speech to.

The speeches then came. As I’d forgotten my notes, I ended up making it up as I went along – but in the end, it was very well received, and I had a lot of complements about it, which again, I thank all of you for! But my work wasn’t done, I was then directing people up to the buffet, table by table, and bar a few people from the Best family, and a cheeky text asking to be picked next (who ended up getting picked last – serves her right!), people were generally good about this, and it gave me a chance to talk to the various guests.

I then ended up directing the photographs, (i.e. calling the various groups), and that was stressful, trying to get everyone needed at any one time in the same place! Soon after, the first dance! I’ll let you find the photos of me dancing with the maid of honour!

Ben and Naomi left shortly after. I said a quick prayer, and they were on their way, starting married life in Holland.

I thought that was it for me – and spent an hour on the Beach with a few friends, watching the sunset and skimming stones. When I walked back into the club, however, the DJ had it in for me! One YMCA, Saturday Night, Hokey Cokey, Cha Cha Slide and one other dancy-type song later (the one where you sit on the floor) – I was embarrassing myself in front of other guests! Haha! Again, pictures exist.

I finally left about 10.30, and after taking a friend back to where she was staying and picking up Ben’s spare key’s from his friend, I was ready to fall asleep. The week had been stressful, but it had gone well. I wrote in the Guest Book a rather lengthy passage for Ben and Naomi, and went to bed, still smiling.

Reflecting on this, yeah, being the Best Man is highly draining, but it has been one of the best experiences in my life, and I am honoured to have been the Best Man. The work was worth it! So much so, that I left the following P.S. for Ben in his guest book…

“P.S. Ben, just you wait until my wedding! You’ll love every minute of it! I did!”